When I encounter people who want to hurt me or treat me badly in some way I often react with defensiveness and anger.
This reaction hurts me, hurts the other and doesn’t do anyone any good.
So I am working on it!
My habits are strong, therefore I need to be quite conscious and vigilant when I feel I’m under attack.
One of the things I do in these situations to try and change my reactions is to look deeper into the other person.
I try and listen very carefully when angry or abusive people are talking to me. Listen with more than my ears. I look deeply into their being, beyond what feels like their anger, deception and self-interest.
When I can notice the suffering that causes them to be harsh with me instead of speaking from their heart I am better able to have compassion for them.
Remember: No one is ever what he or she appears to be!
We are all Divine and searching for our truth.
Let us try not to be deceived by the appearance of the ego.
Do not react to the surface!
Of course if I want to see past other people’s anger I have to see past my own.
I have to see beyond my own self-interest and self-preservation.
This is not easy.
It is a challenge to face myself without condemning myself,
which of course is why we often avoid it.
We must love ourselves enough to look at our sh-t and then look beyond it to the light within.
Then we can do the same for others.
When interacting with people, watch for the trap of your fearful thoughts, your personal identifications, your belief in the personality.
These are all standard tricks used by the mind to make us believe we are separate, that we have to fight and protect ourselves in order to be safe. The mind wants us to forget the infinite power that we are, that dwells in everything.
The mind is very subtle. It is righteous and can appear very spiritual and kind.
It uses great truths with a slight twist to make it seem reasonable to think and act in a non-loving way.
Or, even more subtle:
To make a non-loving action look like a loving one!
My ego wants me to feel separate and alone,
wants me to be attached to hidden motives in people
instead of the deeper Spirit!
Never forget that the most basic inner purpose of human behaviour is to join with the infinite.
It is usually deeply buried and can be very hard to see at times, but it’s always there.
This is why to it’s important for us to put in the work so we can learn to see this dynamic in anyone, under any circumstance.
0 thoughts on “Looking Deeper!”
So true! It takes a lot of looking deep inside to ourselves and others.
Ourselves – why did it hurt?
and the Other – Why did they want to hurt?
Both come from our previous pain and experiences. How we act towards the person who is trying to be hurtful, is the key to how much we want to change our own pain into growth and help the other to feel a little love or at least a tiny bit of acceptance.
I so very much would like to be conscious of whether I act or react. A lot of my happiness depends on it.
Thanks for those wise words Shivani.
How do you think we can move from reacting to acting more consciously?