Communication is a funny thing.
It can uplift us, bring us great joy and learning
Or it can destroy relationships and cause great pain.
It really is quite a YinYang.
I have been studying and practicing communication for nearly 30 years now,
yet I still make communication mistakes with the people in my life,
and it causes no end of trouble!
It is a lifelong journey of learning and growth.
Realizing how vital this skill is
and how devastating a lack of this skill can be
I decided in my early twenties to look very deeply
at how I communicate with others.
I wanted to continuously improve that skill
so that I could bond deeper with my loved ones
family, friends, my child and all the people who mean something to me.
I wanted to deepen my relationships.
I knew that better communication skills would be a huge part of that process.
Of course there are many theories of communication.
There are many systems that teach you how to communicate effectively.
One could read and study for many lifetimes I believe.
Sincerity Is Fundamental To Good Communication
In essence I think one of the most fundamental aspects
of good communication is a deep desire to be sincere.
It may seem obvious, but sincerity actually requires a lot of work.
Being sincere means examining my motives at all times.
As I looked into my own communication ability, tendencies and habits
I noticed that my words, my actions, my intentions and my values
were not always in synch.
Synchronize Your Inner World
I began to ask myself
Do my motives line up with my core values,
the things I really believe are important?
Do I live my life by those values?
It takes effort to live consistent with my Values.
Making my words, actions and even my thoughts consistent with them.
When I do, this creates the ingredients of true sincerity.
Beginning communication from a position of sincerity,
where my life is in harmony with my chosen values
it is much easier for me to listen to the other person with an open mind and heart.
It is also easier for me to express myself in an honest way.
Create Space For Everyone
If I am living from my truth
then I can make space for multiple points of view
and work towards finding a resolution that includes everyone.
Communication like this makes all parties feel cared for and included.
It encourages everyone to work towards the big picture benefit of all.
Profound Communication is SEXY!
Good communication is such a turn on for me.
It is one of the things that gets me most excited.
When two or more people who are in
a really good head and heart space
come together to communicate about something deep
and work their way through whatever comes up
in an honest, direct, kind and supportive way
There is almost nothing as satisfying.